Harvard crew.


I generally make a point of not trying to be all shill-y on this blog, even though I do talk about my workplace quite a bit. We’re scrambling a bit, because our printed publication’s subscribership has gone down about 75% in the last five years as the Internet has taken hold even further. But people can’t find our website (partly because of a too-be-rectified SEO issue) and/or just can’t be fucking bothered to FIND INFORMATION ON THEIR OWN. So I get phone calls and emails asking when we’re playing a film we’ve already played, or if parking is free, or any one of 800 other queries that could easily be answered by visiting our very informational website. This is getting worse because now my name and email address are right in the printed guide. Yay.

(Listen, I know people are busy. I’m often very busy (ANSWERING STUPID QUESTIONS). But instead of spending your day typing ‘lol 2 cute!!’ in reply to pictures of babies with spaghetti on their heads or watching videos of trampolining foxes for hours a day, try learning something.)

This week, I was persuaded to make an ‘official’ Facebook presence for the cinema (we had two ‘fanclubs’ there, set up by random customers, but then Facebook Groups got reorganized and they got archived or something) after I was reminded that, for some people, Facebook is pretty much the whole internet; they don’t really read anything online unless it’s there, or linked to from a friend’s News Feed, or whatever. And as much as I hate to say it because it seems so old hat and naff and terribly uncool, I do spend a great deal of time there, largely because it’s the only way I hear from some people, especially those who seem to find things like email too complicated.*

However, after I set this official group up, and got a couple of dozen subscribers, I realised that we had an auto-generated (through customers’ ‘checking in’) Places page. Which has 100+ ‘Likes’. Which is low, lame, and confusing, but I signed up to be admin of that too.

I can merge these two presences, but in order for the one I set up, which actually has stuff on it, to be the Alpha, I have to wait until it has more ‘Likes’ than the first one. That could take forever.

And when I think about this, the whole thing seems like a preposterous waste of time and a terrifying retooling of the online world and English language. Seriously, would the above have made any sense six years ago? Does it now? No, not really.

*I can only assume, as they don’t email, they send Facebook messages.

Speaking of the Internet, here’s a flashback to 1999 in Official Websites for Hollywood films. Oh, Netscape.

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