Very bad days.


My mother died six years ago today. We’re going to brunch in commemoration, though I’m not sure I’m going to bring the Travel Scrabble (as I would have done if it had been Mum and I going).

She was an amazing lady. Realistically, I don’t know how I could ever turn a blog post into something worthy of her wonderfulness, so instead I will talk about how, at my grandmother’s funeral (coincidentally, The Elder Matriarch would have been 101 today – yes, her 95th was a terrible day), I was taken aback by something on the wall of St Timothy’s church and suddenly felt like I was in Back to the Future.

None of these people have faded out of the photo, though the dude on the right obviously had no friends as he was standing separately. (You can click through to a larger version.)

Third from the left in this photo of the confirmation class of 1959-60 is the scowly, eyerolly face of my own adolescence! Okay, my nose is different and I was far less dedicated to trying to get my (similarly) ramrod straight hair to curl, but that’s pretty much my face. Through my tears, I laughed, because Mum was there, and is here, in my face, always.

Here’s a song that played at her memorial service. It was chosen by my aunt (her sister), who said that whenever she heard it, she thought of Mum. And although I don’t remember my mother ever listening to it, it fits her pretty much to a tee.


And then we played this, because it fit too. πŸ™‚


2 thoughts on “Very bad days.

  1. Rachel

    Oh dear. Thinking of your Mum always makes me feel selfishly bad because I didn’t make it to her funeral. I also am unable to describe her wonderfulness, except to say that she was the only Mum that was able to crack our preteen and teenage psyche and give us advice, or let us do “rebellious” things like paint on your bedroom floor, watch restricted movies, or eat donuts for breakfast. I have been thinking of motherhood a lot lately and I think she was one of the mums that was able to be your friend, but also be your mum. That photo is amazing! I was able to pick your Mum out right away, but I didn’t correlate her expression to yours in many of our high school photos (I wouldn’t say scowly, just serious πŸ™‚ until you pointed it out. Uncanny! Thinking of you and your Mum and Ian and Rory today,
    Love Rachel

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